Who Will Win Survivor 40: Winners at War?

After 20 years, 39 seasons, 582 episodes and 590 castaways, the day that every Survivor super fan has been waiting decades for has finally arrived; the premiere of Survivor 40: Winners at War. 

With the stakes raised to two million dollars, the most legendary winners of all time will compete for the title of the greatest to ever play the game.

As a super fan from day one, who had a VHS tape pre-loaded into his VCR to capture the first seconds of episode one in Survivor Borneo, has re-watched every season multiple times, as well as watched every season of Survivor Australia and Survivor South Africa, and dozens of seasons of Survivor Maryland, Survivor Boston, Survivor UCONN, Survivor Michigan, Survivor OSU, Survivor PhiladelphiaSurvivor Buffalo, and Syrvivor (sic) Syracuse, I would be remiss to not cover this legendary season.

Come back to Ryan’s Countdowns each week to see who is forging the path to victory, and whose dream of being the best of the best is all but crushed.

Who will win Survivor 40: Winners at War

20. Boston Rob Mariano, Survivor Redemption Island

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Boston Rob Mariano (photo credit: CBS.com)

Boston Rob has played the game of Survivor more times than anyone alive. This being his fifth appearance on the show, will make him the number one target. Despite playing four times, Boston Rob has never been on a Survivor jury, as he was voted out pre-jury two times, and sat in the final 2/3 two times.

Seeing as this season has an Edge of Extinction twist, which means most, if not all the players will be on the jury or a finalist, expect Boston Rob to finally get to decide who wins the grand prize.

This will, however, more than likely not be the final time Boston Rob will play Survivor though, as he is a lock for any Legends season that may be in the works, no matter how quickly he gets voted out of Winners at War. 

19. Sandra Diaz-Twine, Survivor Pearl Islands & Survivor Heroes Vs. Villains

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Sandra Diaz-Twine (photo credit: CBS.com)

No matter what happens this season on Winners at War, Sandra is, and will always remain the queen of Survivor. At the moment, she is the first, and only person to win Survivor two times, though that is bound to no longer be the case come May.

Her nineteen competitors will have too much respect for the legend to vote her out at the first few Tribal Councils, but they will also have too much prior knowledge to not vote her out come the first swap.

Sandra’s “anybody but me,” strategy may have won her two million already, but the odds of her doubling her Survivor winnings, are all but non-existent.

18. Sarah Lacina, Survivor Game Changers

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Sarah Lacina (photo credit: CBS.com)

Being the most recent female winner, as well as the most recent winner of an all returnee season, Sarah has a double target on her back.

Playing the game with so many “type A” personalities may be the only thing that could possibly work in her favor, seeing as see may be overlooked while her competitors go after bigger targets. But on the same token, she may be so overlooked that nobody will think about including her in any of their alliances.

Plus, of all twenty winners, she is very likely the least intimidating, meaning that the others will not be scared to throw her name around in hopes of getting the numbers to vote her off.

Besides legends Boston Rob, Sandra and Parvati, Sarah may have the biggest uphill battle of them all.

17. Amber Mariano, Survivor All Stars

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Amber Mariano (photo credit: CBS.com)

This may sound too far fetched, but Amber was my winner pick for Survivor All Stars the first time I saw the cast. And if she never married Boston Rob, she would be my winner pick for Winners at War as well.

Amber is likable, level headed, and, at least 16 years ago, was a solid challenge competitor.

However, seeing as both her and her husband have already won a million dollars from the show, and seeing how the others may deem it to be “unfair” that a married couple are playing together, Amber, much like her husband, has very little chance of winning Winners at War. 

If the name Mariano does happen to be on the two million dollar check at the end, it will without a doubt have the name Amber in front of it.

16. Adam Klein, Survivor Millennials Vs. Gen X

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Adam Klein (photo credit: CBS.com)

Adam Klein is, hands down, the biggest fan that has ever won the show, and potentially the biggest fan to ever play the game. He is a true student of the game in every sense of the term. His massive disadvantage though, is that everyone knows it.

Klein played a near flawless game in Millennials Vs. Gen X, winning in a unanimous 10-0-0 vote, but to duplicate that same game with 19 other people that are just as good as he is, will be nearly impossible for him.

He had a fire in him to win his last season for his dying mother who passed away just two days after he returned home from filming. But this time, now that he accomplished his wish of his mom knowing he won Survivor, he may be too starstruck by his idols to be able to focus on winning the game for himself.

15. Yul Kwon, Survivor Cook Islands

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Yul Kwon (photo credit: CBS.com)

Survivor is quite different now than it was the first time Yul played the game. While he found the only hidden immunity idol of the season on day five, he never had to use it as the rules of the hidden immunity idol were much different.

Back in Yul’s day, the hidden immunity idol could be played after the votes were read. Once the rest of the castaways found out that Yul had the idol, of course nobody would vote him out, all but guaranteeing him a spot in the final four.

Yul is extraordinarily likable, in just about as good of shape as a human being can be, and is basically a genius. All great qualities to have in a regular season of Survivor, but all massive targets that will be impossible to overlook in an all winners season.

14. Tony Vlachos, Survivor Cagayan

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Tony Vlachos (photo credit: CBS.com)

Although not as much of a household name as Boston Rob, Sandra and Parvati, Tony is right up there in terms of the game’s most legendary players.

His epic win in Survivor Cagayan, however, is leveled out by his second appearance in Survivor Game Changers, in which he was the second person voted out of the game.

Tony may be too much of a personality to ignore, and it would be shocking if the winners he is up against allow him to make it late in the game, where he would likely backstab anyone he needed to in order to win the game.

It is undeniable that Tony plays hard and will have to take more of a backseat in Winners at War if he plans on making it far. But that is relying heavily on the slim chance that Tony has any idea what it means to take a back seat on anything.

13. Parvati Shallow, Survivor Micronesia

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Parvati Shallow (photo credit: CBS.com)

With the exception of possibly Kim who has a strong has of being the best to ever play the game, Parvati is the only person who could win the season and have a realistic debate as to whether or not she deserves to dethrone Sandra as the official queen of Survivor. 

She has played three times, finishing sixth place in Survivor Cook Islands, winning the half-returnee season of Survivor Micronesia, and being the runner-up (to Sandra) in what many consider to be the best season ever, Survivor Heroes Vs. Villains. 

While she deserves much more credit than simply being a talented flirt, it is her flirting abilities that many chalk up to why she got so far each time she played.

Now that she is married (to former Survivor Samoa contestant John Fincher,) and a mother to her newborn son, she will have to prove she has what it takes to be the best player ever without her tactful art.

If any of the big name legends has a shot at winning Winners at War though, it is, most certainly Parvati Shallow.

12. Denise Stapley, Survivor Philippines

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Denise Stapley (photo credit: CBS.com)

Winning Survivor Philippines at just 41 years old, Denise is the oldest woman to ever win Survivor, and overall the second oldest winner to win the game.

Despite her “old” age, Denise may be in the best shape of all the woman competing.

Even more impressive, she is the only person to ever play the game and attend every Tribal Council along the way. Denise managed to survive all 15 Tribal Councils, only receiving six votes against her all season.

She is mostly remembered for her tight friendship/alliance with Malcolm, who was seventeen years younger.

Denise played the “mother” role perfectly her first time, but with an all winners cast, many of which are just a few years younger than her, she may find that the role of “mother” is not only unneeded, but also potentially a reason to vote her out.

If she makes it to the final Tribal Council, she has this in the bag, but it is not very likely these winners will allow her to get there.

11. Wendell Holland, Survivor Ghost Island

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Wendell Holland (photo credit: CBS.com)

It was just a few seasons ago that Wendell and his alliance-mate Domenick dominated Survivor Ghost Island, resulting in the first ever tie vote at the final Tribal Council.

Unfortunately for Wendell, this is probably pretty fresh in the minds of the winners. Wendell’s likability and charm enabled him to make it to the end of Ghost Island, and will likely get him a respectable placement in Winners at War, but it is difficult to imagine a scenario in which anyone would want to face him in a final Tribal Council where two million dollars is rewarded to the winner.

10. Ben Driebergen, Survivor Heroes Vs. Healers Vs. Hustlers

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Ben Driebergen (photo credit: CBS.com)

Of all 38 people to ever win Survivor, many consider Ben to be the least deserving (with the possible exception of Edge of Extinction winner, Chris Underwood.)

This may lead some to believe that Ben will be an early target for the Winners at War cast that likely consider themselves a superior winner.

However, due to this, he will almost certainly not be seen as a threat, which should propel him to the end game. If he is sitting at the final Tribal Council though, the jury will probably have a strong opinion about him being there…

A) He will get hate for “not deserving to be there in the first place.”

or…

B) He will get love for “proving everyone wrong that said he was not deserving of a place in Winners at War.”

Either way, Ben will very likely do much better than many people would assume.

9. Natalie Anderson, Survivor San Juan del Dur

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Natalie Anderson (photo credit: CBS.com)

Originally on Survivor Blood Vs Water with her twin sister Nadiya, who was the first person voted out of the game, Natalie played one of the most dominating games of any winner competing this season.

She is a physical, mental and social threat, but she is not one to shy away from confrontation, which could make her an easy target.

Her very good friend and Blood Vs. Water co-star, Jeremy, is also playing this season, which will be a built in ally for Natalie, but since it is common knowledge how close the two are, this could make her target even bigger to separate the power couple.

If Jeremy gets voted out early on, which is highly unlikely, and if Natalie can learn to fly under the radar, also highly unlikely, Natalie could come out on top once more (again, highly unlikely.)

8. Sophie Clarke, Survivor South Pacific

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Sophie Clarke (photo credit: CBS.com)

Sophie is the first real contender that has, what I deem to be, a decent shot to win this season.

She is humorous, but not too funny.
Sophie is athletic, but not overly athletic.
She is social, but not fake.

Her downfall, she is extremely intelligent, and everyone knows it.

After beating Ozzy in the final immunity challenge in Survivor South Pacific, then beating returnee, and Survivor icon, Coach in the final three, Sophie has proven that she is a major force to be reckoned with.

7. Nick Wilson, Survivor David Vs. Goliath

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Nick Wilson (photo credit: CBS.com)

Being the most recent winner in the cast of Winners at War, Nick has his work cut out for him. He hasn’t had years to mingle and socialize with his cast members, and will probably not be going in with any pre-game alliances.

Also to his detriment, Nick’s win in David Vs. Goliath is fresh on everyone’s minds, which may make him an early, easy target.

However, if he can make it past the first two votes and survive long enough to make some friends and create some bonds, he will likely be forgotten about and will cruise to the end game.

Once there, he is good enough with his words to convince the jury that he deserves the title for coming into the game and being able to make it to the end while starting at such an extreme disadvantage.

6. Jeremy Collins, Survivor Cambodia

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Jeremy Collins (photo credit: CBS.com)

Jeremy is a triple threat of a strong physical, mental and social player. He learned from the mistakes he made in Blood Vs. Water and ended up turning his game around in Survivor Second Chance to win one of the most competitive seasons to date.

There is a good chance his charm can get him deep into the game, where he will likely have to win his way to the end. If he is in the final three, he has a solid chance of winning, but he has been around long enough for his fellow castaways to know all too well what a dangerous move it would be to sit next to him for a jury vote.

5. Michele Fitzgerald, Survivor Kaoh Rong

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Michele Fitzgerald (photo credit: CBS.com)

With the possible exception of Ben, Michele may be the winner that has the most to prove on Winners at War. Many think she was undeserving winner, which has always confused me.

She has a exceptional social game, is good at challenges, and is remarkably likable. She was my pick for runner up in Kaoh Rong, and is a strong contender for my winner pick in Winners at War. If I had to choose who I would want to win, it would be Michele, simply to quiet all of her haters.

But thinking logically, unless she is voted out first, she will almost certainly make the finale, will likely be sitting in the final three, and will secure her streak of never being voted out of Survivor.

4. Tyson Apostol, Survivor Blood Vs. Water

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Tyson Apostol (photo credit: CBS.com)

The best thing that Tyson has going for him is that he is a goofball. He is one of the funniest people to ever play and despite being one of the best, he may not be taken seriously enough for the Winners at War cast to target him.

If he plays the role of “I am just here to have fun,” he could be used as number, and be carried along to the end, which he would have a very solid chance of winning due to his amazing speaking skills.

He has the ability to comes across as if he doesn’t know what he is doing, but in reality has the intelligence to completely fool everyone.

Regardless of his final placement in the game, I expect massive moves from Tyson, and for him to be the most exciting castaway to watch this season.

3. Kim Spradlin-Wolfe, Survivor One World

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Kim Spradlin-Wolfe (photo credit: CBS.com)

Despite playing the game only one time, Kim Spradlin-Wolfe is considered by many to be the best of all time. Nobody has come close to dominating the game on their first appearance the way that Kim did on Survivor One World. 

If the castaways truly are the legends many of them claim to be, they would vote Kim out the first time she goes to Tribal Council.

However, it is much more likely that Kim will swoon people over with her charm, and people will flock to her.

It is hard to imagine Kim ever getting voted out of Survivor, and there is a strong chance we will never see it happen.

If Kim is in the final three, she wins against anyone besides Ethan.

2. Ethan Zohn, Survivor Africa

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Ethan Zohn (photo credit: CBS.com)

Nineteen years after his dominating win in Survivor Africa, Ethan Zohn is poised to be the first man to ever win the game twice.

Nobody has a better story than Zohn, who has battled cancer for the past decade, and was convinced he would never play Survivor again. Not because he wouldn’t be asked to play, but because he wouldn’t be alive.

Ethan has been to hell and back and has proven he can survive things way bigger, scarier and harder than this game.

If Ethan makes the merge, which he will, he will either be voted out in fifth place, or crowned the champion of Winner at War. 

1. Danni Boatwright, Survivor Guatemala

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Danni Boatwright (photo credit: CBS.com)

Danni Boatwright is one of the most underrated winners of the game, and her season of Survivo

r Guatemala, much like herself, is often unjustly overlooked.

As a sports broadcaster and international model, Danni can very easily fit in with both the girls and the guys. Danni has the perfect blend of social, physical and intellectual skills that are not only needed to win a regular season, but also to win the most anticipated season of all time.

Though she may not get the most screen time, have the most confessionals, or make the biggest moves, I expect Danni Boatwright to be a household name once the season is over, and she is named the official Greatest Survivor of All Time.

Come back next week for the updated rankings after episode 1.

Ranking the Cast of Big Brother Canada 5 (The Underdogs)

Sorry friends and family, but it’s that time of the year again, where for three months I will be talking with a Canadian accent and saying things like “it’s Aboot time you showed up,” or “get your arse out of my seat.” And you remember that time of the year that my fridge is constantly stocked with LaBatt Blue and Molson, and I insist on asking our waiter if they serve Poutine? Yep, its that time. You guessed it, Big Brother Canada is back, and I’m about to get full on Canuck on your asses. Ya know, eh?

This year Big Brother Canada dropped the bomb that they will be filling the house with eight returning players looking to get redemption for their first unsuccessful stint in the house. And they will be playing against eight unlucky newbies, most of which will be inevitably evicted by week five.

The difference in caliber between the vets and the newbies seems so astronomically out of place that I would be willing to bet a lifetime supply of Tim Horton’s coffee and doughnuts that one of the eight vets will be handed the title as the winner of the fifth season of the reality show.

Nevertheless, I will rank the odds of each of the 16 contestant’s chances that they will join Jillian, Jon,  Sarah and the Paquette brothers as Big Brother Canada champions.

 

THE UNDERDOGS

16. Dre

(globaltv.com)

 

Dre will enter the house and become an easy target because of her loud, boisterous personality. Her over-confidence will lead her to believe that the whole house loves her, when in actuality, they will find her annoying and an easy first boot.

“The whole house will love me and want to be me” says Dre in her pre-season interview. Well, I would be willing to bet that not one person in the house will want to be Dre on the first eviction night.

Additionally, Dre mentions Cass and Neda in her interview, so she will be itching to work with them. The vet guys, not yet wanting to target their female counterparts early on, will see Dre as a liability, and send her ass packing as quickly as possible. And Neda and Cass will gladly offer her us as a sacrificial slaughter.

If her answer to the question of “What three words best describes you?” is an indication for how much of a train wreck Dre is going to be, then I am convinced Dre will be evicted before St. Patrick’s Day Weekend.

Her three words: hilarious, extra caring (but I pretend not to care.)

That may be the all-time stupidest answer to that age old question.

FINAL PREDICTION: First Boot

 

15. William

(globaltv.com)

 

First off, I get that Willaim is French Canadian, and French is his first language and all, but I am pretty sure he just made a noise when he said his name. Is there any way that is possibly how he says his name? Watch the first 3 seconds of the clip below to help you understand my confusion…

William has thought long and hard at home about what his strategy going into the Big Brother Canada house is going to be, and it is revolutionary. This guy must be a superfan because the amount of Big Brother knowledge one must obtain to help devise such a scheming plan of attack is very next level thinking. So what is this plan that William has that is all but guaranteed to make him one of the greatest Big Brother players of all time?

“I’m going to try to find thing… everything in the house. Like if there’s not a secret room, like, I really thought about that at home, like, think I’m going to press every wall to see if there is something like hidden in… somewhere.”

Well don’t get too nervous about losing your title as Best Player Ever just yet Dr. Will, because it looks like Big Brother may have found William’s kryptonite. Could this be the only thing that could take down this Big Brother historian?

“I’m scared of being like, uh…. there’s two things. Always speaking English, and doing things with my mouth.”

FINAL PREDICTION… we will be seeing William pushing and poking every wall on his way out the door, trying to find an eviction safety room by week 3.

 

14. Sindy

(globaltv.com)

 

Cindy with an S has been evicted from Big Brother Canada twice, and from the online reality show, Sequester, twice. She holds the record for most eviction votes received by any contestant in a single season with 20. She is the lowest-ranking returning houseguest of any North American Big Brother series. And she is also the first Big Brother Canada houseguest to be evicted twice in one season, as fellow Big Brother 5 houseguest, Gary Levy made it to the final 2 in Big Brother Canada 1.

Bottom line, Sindy is not good at this stuff. BUT…… she has a fun nickname because she spells her name unconventionally. So let’s keep bringing her back until we can find a better girl named Sarah that spells her name with a C. Carah-with-a-C is so much more fun than Sindy-with-an-S.

FINAL PREDICTION: Pre Jury/First Vet Evicted

After a quick Twitter search, I found a contestant for next season. You’re welcome casting.

(Sarah with a C, potential Big Brother Canada 6 Contestant. twitter.com/CarahAmelie)

 

 

13. Dillon

(globaltv.com)

 

Professional boxer, Dillon, says his biggest strength is “his strength… as a human.” WTF?  He says he wants to win every competition. And we all know about his physical strength “as a human,” so he should be a target from the get-go.

But don’t count out your favorite non-Dillon houseguest yet, because luckily for the rest of the house, Dillon may not fare as well in the mental competitions. Here is an actual phrase that Dillon strung together during his pre season interview with Global….

“… girls want to meet me, guys want to be me. Everybody wants to meet me as far as everything goes……So I think that’s gonna translate well.”

FINAL PREDICTION: He will be the Paul Abrahamian from Big Brother 18, if Paul from BB18 got voted out pre jury.

 

Next 4 houseguests, the dark horses, coming tomorrow. 

And no, I do not have a spreadsheet at home. Thanks to Big Brother Wiki for all the Sindy facts. Not all heroes wear capes.

17 Celebrities That Need To Be On Dancing With The Stars (Part 3)

After 23 seasons of ABC’s hit reality show Dancing With the Stars, fans will likely be able to get a good idea about what the cast will look like, even before it’s revealed tomorrow on Good Morning, America.

If past seasons are any indication, there will be a washed up reality star, an Olympian, The Bachelor, a Disney Channel actor, an NFL player, a C-list celebrity that has recently been involved in a controversy, etc.

So, if the producers decided to stray away from their typical cast, and if all the celebrities that got an invite decided to participate, what would the ideal cast look like? The following is a ranking of the 17 celebrities that Dancing With the Stars desperately needs to scout out, to shake up their boring, mundane casting.

FOR PART 1 (#17-#13) CLICK HERE
FOR PART 2 (#12-#8) CLICK HERE

 

7. Emilia Clarke, Actress

(winteriscoming.net)

 

If the thought of the Mother of Dragons doing the Jitterbug doesn’t get you excited then you should probably check your pulse… or start watching Game of Thrones

Now that the hit HBO show is nearing the end of its run, Emilia Clarke, who plays Mother of Dragons – Queen of Meereen – Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea – Protector of the Realm – Queen of the Andals and the First Men – Breaker of Chains – The Unburnt -Widow of Khal Drogo – Daenerys Targaryen of the House of Targaryen, A.K.A. Dany, should have a bit more free time on her hands.

With Game of Thrones scheduled to end next year, ABC would be stupid not to begin talks with her ASAP to get her on the dance floor in 2018.

REALISTIC CHANCE OF SEEING HER ON DANCING WITH THE STARS: 50%

6. Greg Louganis, Olympic Gold Medalist

(yahoo.com)

 

We all know the risk a celebrity takes when joining the cast of Dancing With the Stars. From broken bones, fatigue, and ruptured tendons, to neck injuries, back injuries and people just fainting for no apparent reason. The dance floor is a dangerous place to be.

We all know that Greg Louganis, Olympic Diving Champion, can deal with pain.

(theguardian.com)

 

Unbeknownst to the world, Louganis was diagnosed with HIV just months before the 1988 Olympic Games. It was there that millions of people around the world watched in horror as he smashed his head doing a quadruple – axle – twisting triple luxe, head-shoulder-knees-toes- combo. Louganis was then shrouded in controversy by not immediately disclosing the fact that had been diagnosed with the disease, thus potentially endangering other divers.

Now 56 years old, Louganis is still in tip-top shape and uses his celebrity to advocate for the LGBT community. He would undoubtedly use his diving skills to wow the audience, and make a splash (but not like a cannonball splash, a perfectly dainty splash) in the competition.

REALISTIC CHANCE OF SEEING GREG ON DANCING WITH THE STARS: 99%

5. Ronda Rousey, UFC Fighter

(Rondarousey.net)

 

Odds are that ABC has repeatedly asked Rousey to participate on their show. After all, she is very good friends with DWTS superstars Derek Hough and Mark Ballas. I have even sat next to Ballas at one of Rousey’s Vegas fights before (not that I really remember after the 87 beers that I had, but there is photographic evidence, and probably tweets on Ballas’ Twitter account complaining about the drunk guy next to him that keeps asking him if Edyta Śliwińska is as hot in real life as she in on TV.) Additionally, the show just had her rival Paige Vanzant on last season, the odds are, they settled for her.

But now that Rousey’s fighting career is nearing its end, it is very likely that the UFC legend will in the ballroom and show the world her softer side before you can say “greatest female fighter of all time and most dangerous ballerina alive.”

REALISTIC CHANCE OF SEEING RHONDA ON DANCING WITH THE STARS: 95%

 

4. Macaulay Culkin, Actor

(eonline.com)

 

Macaulay Culkin has had quite a tumultuous ride after he shot to child actor superstardom after the 1990 Christmas classic, Home Alone.

For whatever reason, Culkin has been the subject of multiple internet rumors over the years, ranging from his drug abuse and heroin addiction to even his death. Dancing With the Stars would be just the platform that he could use to show the world that he is alive and well. That is, of course, if he is alive and well. Who the hell knows… just yesterday I heard that he voluntarily cryogenically froze his body so he could be brought back to life in 2090 to reprise his role in Home Alone 30. And I’m fairly certain it is not a rumor.

Anyway, the world still desperately wants to talk about Macaulay Culkin, so in the words of the great Bonnie Raitt, “let’s give ’em something to talk about,” Macaulay.

REALISTIC CHANCE OF SEEING MACAULAY ON DANCING WITH THE STARS: 75%

3. “Baby Jessica” – Well Survivor

(cbsnews.com)

 

The 1980’s was responsible for some pretty horrific events. John Lennon was assassinated, Mt. St. Helens erupted, The Challenger exploded, the AIDS epidemic swept the nation, the Tiananmen Square massacre, and Chernobyl did whatever the hell Chernobyl did. But, other than the evening that Michael Jackson’s hair caught fire while filming a Pepsi commercial, and getting over the fact that Milli Vanilli wasn’t actually Milli Vanilli, nothing was more traumatic than Baby Jessica falling down a well the size of a pint of Ben and Jerry’s.

The world was infatuated with Baby Jessica, and the world deserves an update on the infant that we spent so many nights being captivated by. You had the world at your fingertips in 1987 Baby Jessica, lets see if you can keep those fingertips pointed perfectly while doing the Viennese Waltz with Val Chmerkovskiy.

REALISTIC CHANCE OF SEEING BABY J ON DANCING WITH THE STARS: 30%

 

2. George W. Bush, Former President

(totalfratmove.com)

 

Whether you loved the guy or hated him as a politician, there is no denying that George W Bush is quite a charismatic guy that would be highly entertaining on Dancing With the Stars. The internet could not get enough of him trying to put on his poncho at the President Trump inauguration, and Bush could use his poncho momentum to pull in some swing votes in the Dancing With the Stars competition. I never knew how badly I needed to see George W Bush and Karina Smirnoff do a Tango to “Singing in the Rain,” while partially wearing a plastic poncho with the Presidential Seal on it, until now.

(avclub.com)

 

And we already know that former President Bush is not afraid to get jiggy with it in front of an audience.

(telegraph.co.uk)

 

(buzzfeed.com)

 

ABC, if you don’t cast Bush on Dancing With the Stars, can you at least follow him around for his own reality show? This guy is TV gold.

INSERT MIRROR BALL TROPHY HERE (ibtimes.co.uk)

 

REALISTIC CHANCE OF SEEING GWB ON DANCING WITH THE STARS: 5%

 

1. Courtney Love, Rock Star

(usweekly.com)

 

If you had to make a list of 5 celebrities that you would like to see prance around the ballroom doing the Waltz and Courtney Love is not on that list, than you clearly do not know who Courtney Love is.

Widow to the late grunge rock icon, Kurt Cobain, Courtney Love’s appearance on Dancing With the Stars would be the most shocking to date.

Do the censors dare having such a loose cannon on live TV on ABC? Doubtful. But if they do, Courtney Love would take Dancing With the Stars to a whole new level. You thought a shirtless Len Goodman was scary? Wait until you see Courtney Love start losing her temper over continuously forgetting her routine in rehearsals for her jive performance to the song “Rock Around the Clock.”

REALISTIC CHANCE OF SEEING LOVE ON DANCING WITH THE STARS: 55%