Ranking All 30 Bachelor 21 Contestants (Part 4) 10-6

It’s almost the new year and you know what that means… New Year’s resolutions that you will keep for approximately three days, gym memberships that you will pay for and never use, big balls in New York City, and even bigger balls in one very special mansion in Agoura Hills, California. This January, those big balls belong to the Bachelor 21 star, and Bachelor alum that everyone loves to hate…. or hates to love…. or hated but now loves: Nick Viall.

Viall is no stranger to finding love on television, as this is now the fourth dating show that his handsome mug has appeared on. He finished as the runner up in two seasons of The Bachelorette, and made it all the way to the finale in this summer’s Bachelor in Paradise.

While Viall is 36, the cast of ladies this season is littered with twenty-somethings, many of which are in their early twenties. Additionally, the cast of woman this year is by far the most diverse cast in the history of the franchise. If ABC can’t find a minority leading lady for next season’s The Bachelorette from this cast, they likely never will.

The following is a 100% SPOILER-FREE ranking of the thirty ladies in order of the least likely to most likely to win the heart of Nick, based ONLY on their ABC.com profile picture and short bio of ridiculous answers to even more ridiculous questions.

The Ladies of The Bachelor 21: I Need Some Nick In My Life

 

FOR PART 1, LADIES #30 – 21 CLICK HERE.
LADIES #20-16 CLICK HERE.
LADIES #15-11 CLICK HERE.

Continuing….

10. Lacey

Bachelor 21 Contestant, Lacey (abc.com)

 

Lacey seems like a very well educated, well-rounded woman. She graduated with a double degree (she does not mention what degrees, so technically it could be basket weaving and juggling, so take it with a grain of salt) and she is learning Arabic. Also, when asked what three people she would have lunch with, she choose three of the greatest minds the world has ever known.

  1. William Shakespeare – The English poet and author widely regarded as the greatest writer in history.
  2. JK Rowling – The author and genius behind the greatest selling book series of all time, Harry Potter
  3. Joe Jonas – American singer and actor who is responsible for critically acclaimed, groundbreaking roles such as “Himself” in Hannah Montanaand Shane Gray in Camp Rock 2: The Final Jam

While Lacey seems to have the brains and the beauty to go all the way, it may be her jealousy that sends her packing, as her biggest date fear is when “he’s going on another date right after” which she follows by telling us (that has happened before).

Expect Lacey to make it mid season, and after she has an epic meltdown because Nick is going on a one-on-one with the same girl he already went on a one-on-one with in week two, yet she still has not had a one-on-one, will be pulled aside by Nick and shown the door in the most dramatic moment of the season.

 

9. Danielle M

Bachelor 21 Contestant, Danielle M (abc.com)

 

There is a law in Louisiana or Tennessee that says that you can’t eat ice cream on the side of the road, “or something like that” and that really pisses Danielle M right the hell off. So much so, that if Danielle M could break any law with no repercussions, that would be it, according to her abc.com bio. ABC and the producers of the Bachelor just wanted to make sure that we were given that riveting information about Danielle M.

Perhaps more interestingly is the fact that if Danielle M could be any fictional character she would be Hermione Granger from the Harry Potter series because “she’s a smart, clever, beautiful witch.” That is actually a great answer. But what I am most impressed with is the fact that Danielle M understands that a “fictional character” is not limited to Disney princesses. It could possibly be due to the fact that she is 31 years old, which compared to 85% of the cast, is considered elderly.

Not that any of this information about Danielle M matters though because Danielle M had a fiancé that passed away. So the ONLY thing we will get to know about Danielle M is that she had a fiancé that passed away. There is nothing ABC loves more than a dead fiancé and they will soak that shit up for every last drop until Danielle M is eliminated in Nick’s “most difficult Rose ceremony to date.”

 

8. Lauren

Bachelor 21 Contestant, Lauren (abc.com)

 

Things that make Lauren perfect:

  • She is super sexy
  • She is a law school graduate
  • Lauren loves mini golf
  • She wants to be a dolphin, but did not need to make one single reference to The Little Mermaid to get her point across.
  • She gives 100% in relationships to make them fun and adventurous.
  • In 5 years she wants to be happily married with kids and in a house full of laughter.
  • She loves Step Brothers
  • The 5 things she can’t live without are “My super soft vintage Hall & Oates t-shirt, chapstick, my family, sushi, music”

It would be way too easy to say Lauren is going to win, plus she deserves someone better than perfect Nick. Like somebody that runs their own website and makes countdowns about pop culture.

7. Angela

Bachelor 21 Contestant, Angela (abc.com)

 

In five years, Angela wants to be a stay at home mom. Yeah, me too Angela. Also, if Angela never had to ________ she would be very happy. So what it is that Angela never wants to do again? The dreaded act of driving herself. Angela is also a model, so we know she will be thrown into the “here for the right reasons” spotlight, which is never a good thing.

Also, her worst date memory is when a guy wrote down “Batman” while they waited for a table. Unless they were eating at Le Meurice, in Paris, France, that is kind of funny Angela. Take a chill pill, please.

Le Meurice, party of 2 for Batman and buzzkill. (the guardian.com)

 

6. Rachel

Bachelor 21 Contestant, Rachel (abc.com)

 

Rac

hel is ranked at #6 not because she can’t win, but because ABC will have plans on using her as the next Bachelorette, making her the first minority leading lady or man in Bachelor franchise history.

A beautiful, successful attorney, Rachel is what ABC has been waiting for to prove they are not racist, and they will do everything in their power to prep her for The Bachelorette 13. Sorry Nick, Rachel may be single, but ABC has their eyes on her, and it is unlikely they will let her go.

For the Top 5 Ladies – Click Here.